My turn to be a Peer making a Statement of Opinion. This is my Opinion, and I’m allowed at least two, so don’t be surprised when I contradict myself, I love Star Trek AND Star Wars at the same time.
It’s okay to want to be a Peer. Boy, wow, did I want to be recognized as a Peer of the Realm. I wanted that public affirmation of trust, that statement that I was worthy and that I should (wait for it) keep doing what I was doing.
It’s okay to not enjoy every second of every SCA experience. A lot of this is hard, or monotonous, or unpleasant work. It’s okay to be satisfied, but not happy. It’s okay to get tired of it, it’s okay to want to complain about it, and here’s a secret — it is okay to NOT LIKE EVERYONE.
It’s okay to be upset when you see your peers (lower case) recognized as Peers (upper case) all around you, and feel like your day is never going to come. Have people you can trust to talk about it. I had (have?) a Maggie. Get your own, you can’t have mine.
Do all the things. Love, or don’t, the work. Strive, fail, weep, and then get the heck back up and strive again, and if you say to yourself every day “I’m doing this because I want the thing,” there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
But. (My post has a but. Other’s don’t. Don’t want a but? Go read those posts.)
You cannot be truly be a Peer without self reflection. You cannot truly be a Peer without self evaluation. You cannot be truly be a Peer without the realization that you need to improve, not just in your chosen skillset or area of expertise, but AS. A. PERSON. I know some very very lovely people who are Peers in the SCA, and I guarantee you, they all have had those moments where they’ve done something, and realized that it was not-so-great-after all.
Some of us have to do it more, and some of us have to do it less, but we’ve ALL done it. And the best thing about it, is that it puts all the potential in YOUR hands.
Only one person can forever prevent you from being recognized as Peer. Only one person can make you believe that you have not been recognized as a Peer because someone doesn’t like you, or because you’re too old, or because you aren’t allowed to step up to do the right things, or because you live on the wrong street.
That person is you.
If you believe that you don’t have a patent because of those things, you are fooling yourself. Your problem is you.
If you believe that there’s nothing you can do to overcome those things — or the things that are actually impeding you — your problem is you.
I worked so hard. So incredibly hard. To become the person I needed to be, in my heart and my mind. That work happened to help me, I believe, to be recognized as a Peer, as much as that work has also helped me to succeed in my career, which has finally become what I always wanted — to help other people succeed in their careers.
If you want to talk about your struggles, and you’re really ready to think about yourself, I’ll help you.
But I cannot want it more than you do.
YOU have to want to improve. YOU have to want to take a really good look at yourself. Part of my job — part of OUR job — is to lift people up. But I won’t — I can’t — carry you.
I tell my proteges that I cannot teach them how to get a patent, because the only people who can actually make that happen that are Royalty, and They change every 5-7 months. I tell my proteges that there is no path, there is only jungle, and here, I have two machetes – one for them, and one for me.
But I also tell my proteges that I firmly, strongly, and unequivocally believe that they have it in them to be Peers, because that they CAN control.
They only need recognize that themselves. No matter what street they live on.
Pic for the Pic Tax. Also, I got cookies with my device on them at my vigil and you probably did not.
